![]() ![]() I’d want to grab the poor guy by his lapels or messenger bag and say: The bitch doesn’t really love chili dogs that much – no one loves chili dogs that much! And the Cool Girls are even more pathetic: They’re not even pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be. I used to see men – friends, coworkers, strangers – giddy over these awful pretender women, and I’d want to sit these men down and calmly say: You are not dating a woman, you are dating a woman who has watched too many movies written by socially awkward men who’d like to believe that this kind of woman exists and might kiss them. Maybe they’re fooled because so many women are willing to pretend to be this girl. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl. Cool Girls never get angry they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. ![]() Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she’s hosting the world’s biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. “Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. It’s always resonated with me, and now that I’ve discovered FDS, I know why:Įxtracted from "Gone Girl" by Gillian Flynn, monologue by character Amy Dunne: So I came across a post in twoX with one of my favorite monologues. ![]() The movie monologue is different, but also fun if you want to take a look. Because “I like strong women” is code for “I hate strong women.EDIT: just to clarify- this excerpt is from the book only. (How do you know you’re not Cool Girl? Because he says things like: “I like strong women.” If he says that to you, he will at some point fuck someone else. There are variations to the window dressing, but believe me, he wants Cool Girl, who is basically the girl who likes every fucking thing he likes and doesn’t ever complain. It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics. Oh, and if you’re not a Cool Girl, I beg you not to believe that your man doesn’t want the Cool Girl. ![]()
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